Sappy

I’m happy like a dolphin on a t-shirt when it gets put in the wash

I’m sad like Einstein in a judo contest

I’m happy like Hitler wearing nothing but a hand grenade

I’m sad like an Eastenders funeral on Christmas day

I’m happy like Salvador Dali with a paintbrush shoved down the end of his knob

I’m sad like an ice sculpture of Morrissey that is praying for the sun to come out

I’m happy like a mathematician eating his dinner off a number plate

I’m sad like a dog called Cat